Thursday, October 4, 2012

Mammamilk - The Morning Edition

Here's a rundown of our morning.  Enjoy.

6:50  I come downstairs in plenty of time to start breakfast, so I decide to make pancakes.  All is good, all is smooth, everyone is happy.

7:00 Pancakes on the table, kids shuffling in to start eating.

7:10  My husband comes in and we remember that he has to take my van instead of his car to school today (all five kids can't fit in his uber-cool Sportage, so they must take my not-so-uber-cool Astro van).  Rapidly we realize this causes problems - he needs to keep it all day because of a field trip he is going on - and his car doesn't have a car seat for K for her midday pick up.  We resolve this crisis.

7:12  Child going on field trip complains that the Sportage will not be the mode of transportation.  I attempt to point out the Astro's fine features.  Child does not buy it.  The Sportage is cooler - no getting around it.

7:13  I divulge that my van doesn't have enough gas for the field trip.  This puts my husband into high gear and me into drill sergeant mode with the children.

7:18 I continue prodding the children - "GO, GO, GO! You have to get gas before school!"

7:23  The kids are almost ready to get in the van. . .except one.  I go to the stairs to tell him to come down, to hear --

7:25  "I fell into the toilet!!", followed by hysterical crying.

7:26 Suppressing the urge to bang my head against the wall, but permitting the urge to roll my eyes and sigh, I go upstairs to investigate.

7:27  Sure enough, the boy is soaked - entire uniform must be scrapped.  I help him-who-is-still-hysterically-crying clean up and change into new clothes, while saying things like "I am 39 years old.  I have never fallen into a toilet.  How did this happen?"

7:28  I listen to his explanation ("I was going to sit down!  I didn't know it was open!") and try to be understanding.  I may or may not have succeeded in this.

7:30  Get the child in new clothes (after trying two different pairs of undies and two pants, because the first set was bunchy) and send him downstairs and into the van.

7:32  I go turn on the van to see just how much gas there is left.  Report to my husband, who says, "Oh, that'll be enough to get us there - I can get some after I take the kids to school."

7:33  Watch them drive away, shut the door and have a drink.  Oh, okay.  It was a drink of water.

So!   How was your morning?


Danielle said...

My "alarm clock" woke me up precisely at 7:30. I did not realise it was set to "Shreik" mode. No time to pee or even try to open the eyes... The diaper change was surly... Someone would prefer to crawl away EVEN if I have a firm hold of his legs. I literally have to put my legs over him to keep him from going away. And the crying... and he has recently taken up whining... I was afraid the day was going to go rather badly, but we did end up goingto a park, and its a pretty day.

Anne Kimball said...

Mornings. They ain't for the faint of heart! Congrats o getting through it! And thanks for linking up with the TALU!