Yesterday was my second child's 24th birthday. It was a lovely afternoon. . .low key and chill, but full of one my favorite things: family time.
As I've blogged about before, sometime in early parenthood, we started a birthday dinner tradition. Unless we're out of town, we have dinner at home, and I almost always make the birthday cake/dessert. I'm no baker or cook, but it felt important to me to be at home for birthdays (even though I loooove eating out!). We have lots of birthday memories gathered around our dining room table. But my favorite part of our birthday tradition is that everyone (including grandparents or visiting family, and in later years, boyfriends/girlfriends of the birthday girl/boy) takes a turn sharing a thought or two about what they love/appreciate about the person. These have been all over the place over the years (you can read two examples here and here) -- sometimes they're funny, often they're heartfelt, especially as the kids have gotten older, but they always make the recipient feel loved and appreciated.
Today, our two college boys weren't home, but we were able to facetime them both in so they could share their love for our oldest son. As usual, when all three boys are "together", hilarity ensues, and today was no exception. They were laughing and ridiculous, and though we were hours apart, we felt close as we shared this long-standing tradition together. And as has been true especially in recent history, everyone's answers made my heart swell with gratitude. My son is living two "bonus" years at home as he completes his grad degree nearby, and everyone mentioned how much they've loved having him home, and how their relationships with him have grown deeper due to this time together as adults/young adults. I don't often cry during this ritual, but I did today -- having my son home this last year especially has been invaluable to me. His heart, his faith, his spiritual maturity, and the unique way he looks at things has been such a gift to me.
We've come a long way from "he's nice to me!" or "she plays with me!", and the like. Sharing one's heart in front of the whole family (and often others in attendance) can sometimes be challenging, embarrassing, or nerve-wracking. But it's proven to be one of my favorite family traditions. Everyone in attendance benefits from it. I am so grateful for God's gift of family.