Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Little Kids, Big Kids

18 years ago on September 21, I gave birth to our second child, a boy!  It was just 10 days past the September 11 attacks and the nation had been prominent in our thoughts.  But on September 21st, our thoughts were all about our sweet baby boy and our new family of four.

Fast forward 18 years, and our thoughts are still all about our son (and his brothers and sisters).  Family is the biggest blessing we've been given and sometimes I'm overwhelmed by God's gracious outpouring of gifts to us. With these children we've been gifted, however, comes great responsibility.  It is our sacred task to raise up these children to be godly men and women; to first and foremost love their Savior, knowing everything else will flow from that relationship.

When our oldest kids were little, a dear friend said something to me.  I don't remember the context - perhaps she was lamenting something her (slightly older) children were doing or maybe it was just in response to something I was concerned about with my own children.  She said, "Little kids, little problems.  Big kids, big problems."  As a mom with little kids who had what felt like Super Big Problems sometimes, I was not a fan of this adage.  I got the point -- that the bigger the kids were, the more far-reaching and concerning their issues could be.  But still.  I felt like my problems were plenty large and challenging in the moment.

And I still believe that, as I know my friend did too -- when you have little ones underfoot all the live long day, the struggle is real, and the worries are big.  But as the kids have grown up (I am now the parent of TWO adults!  What on earth!), I definitely resonate with what she said.  While so far, praise God, we haven't had any significant issues with our kids, their problems, struggles, challenges and concerns are bigger.  They are thinking about their future, their possible spouses, their higher education and also stretching and growing in their faith.  And that often causes a lot of angst and questioning.

As I've said before, parenting isn't for wienies.  It's not for the faint of heart.  It's full of second-guessing and late night conversations and night after night on our knees in prayer for our kids.  We're in the thick of it still.  Had someone told us (and people probably did!) how parenting would pull at our heart strings, we wouldn't have had any idea how challenging it would be.  But we also wouldn't have had any idea how beautiful, rewarding and fulfilling it would have been either.

I guess it comes down to what stage you're in in life.  When you have little kids, everything feels monumental. And it is!  Training little people up to be kind and compassionate children is a Big Deal.  And when you have big kids, everything feels monumental.  And it is! Shaping and guiding tweens, teenagers and young adults into contributing members of society takes a lot of patience and stick-to-itiveness (Merriam Webster backed me up that that's a read word!) and it's a Big Deal. 

Each parenting stage, from infancy to teens to young adults and beyond is a weighty task.  What a blessing to know that no matter the size of our problems, God is bigger and He will never leave us to handle them on our own.

Regardless of whether or not they're little kid problems or big kid problems.


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