Epic Western Adventure, Part One

By the numbers, details of our trip west:

4    State/National Parks visited (Badlands, Custer, Yellowstone, Grand Tetons)

7    states visited or passed through

50+  times I wiped my little one's rear end, who was plagued with poopy problems the day we left and following

4   hand signals my poopy-plagued-daughter invented to tell me when she was done on the toilet.  Every time.

4376.4  miles driven on the trip

6  number of those miles driven by yours truly

48  degrees (with rain) upon entry of Yellowstone at 7:30 p.m.

50  miles from Yellowstone entrance to our campground

58  degrees (without rain) by the time we arrived at our campsite an hour later.  Hallelujah!

32  predicted degrees one night at Yellowstone, where we were camping without electricity (thankfully it did not get down that low and the snow the children were certain would occur did not materialize)

6  miles we covered to reach Inspiration Point high above Jenny Lake in the Grand Tetons (I joked that my husband and I would have to smooch up there, but no one got it)

1427  wild animals we saw (estimate), including coyotes, bears, bison, snakes, elk, deer, wild horses, pronghorns, mountain goats, bighorn sheep and two pet piglets from California

0  fountain Cokes consumed by this girl while in Yellowstone and Grand Tetons (causing me deep sadness and possibly withdrawal symptoms)

10+  fountain Pepsi machines sighted (causing me a deep bitterness toward Pepsi and the west in general)

18+ times we packed all the food and scented items (basically everything except chairs) into the Suburban at Yellowstone and Grand Tetons due to the high bear population (camping is a lot of work already, and this added to it quite a bit!  Thankfully we only saw bears when safely ensconced in the burb)

And countless memories made, beautiful sights seen,  and experiences shared (and also countless hours in the car!)

A Rose By Any Other Name

I finally know what I want to be when I grow up, take two.

A paint/nail polish color- and hand soap/lotion/candle scent-namer.

Is that a thing?

It has to be.  Someone has to be shut up in a cubicle somewhere churning out winners like these:

Drab (nothing says 'homey retreat' like drab)

Almond Toast (I'm pretty sure my entire downstairs is some version of this color)

Insect Wing (ew!)

Frog Belly 

Mistletoe Kiss (stolen kisses have a color?  who knew?)

Arsenic (who wouldn't want walls reminiscent of poison?)

Jessie  (??? The gal in the cubicle finally got to name one after herself?)

Scarlett O'Hara (well fiddle-dee-dee)

Femininity 

Popcorn, Biscuit, Candy Box (I think Jessie was getting hungry now)

And nail polish colors!  I think the gal naming these must be sunning herself on the beach, drinking, with a tall handsome man nearby. . .

Show me the ring

Guilty Pleasures

Jamaica me Crazy (I say this all the time to the children - true story)

Fish-net Stockings

Mojito Madness

Smooth Sailing

Wicked

Lady Godiva (this one just makes me want chocolate)

And several I can't even mention, since children read this blog!  I rarely wear nail polish - I had no idea how how much the "sex sells" campaign was at work in this industry!

And finally my personal favorites, soap/lotion/candle scents.  The gal naming these, I envision, must be sipping fruity wines amidst a floral garden whilst baking snickerdoodles.

Mango Madarin  (mmmm)

Lavendar Camomille

Wild Passionflower (can't ya just smell it?)

Brown Sugar and Fig

Frosted Cupcake (what the gal is baking next)

Citrus Sunshine

Sundrenched Vineyard (the "office" for the gal writing these)

Pear Blossom Air

Now these names make me happy.  They're pretty creative, but they elicit warm fuzzies, and also make me hungry.  

So!  Who wants to hire me?  I am certain I can come up with names just as good as the ones above.  Let me try a few:

Totes Adorbs Teal

Just-like-spit-up-white

Glowing Halo 

Church-pew-brown (I'll try to clean up the nail-polish-naming industry)

Lilac Loveliness

Citrus Simplicity

Yes!!  I think they're awesome!!  I'm sure I'm a shoo-in.

On Why I Often Have a Headache

I recently read a little blurb about how many questions young children ask per day.  Any guesses?  Here is the shocking (or maybe not-so-shocking!) answer:

About 300!!

Does that make your head swim?  When I first read it, I thought, "No way!"  But then I did a little five minute count and realized it might be right after all.  The study went on to say that four-year-old girls top the charts at almost 400 questions per day.

Know what?  I have a four-year-old girl.  And I think this study has credence.

Just now, as I am typing this, my sweet four-year-old girl came by and fired off these:

"Can I ride my bike?"
"Are these shoes on the right feet?"
"Can you imagine if I walked all the way to the Y?"
"Can you take me to ride my bike?" (asked of her brother)
Repeat above question
"Why?"
"When you're done mowing can you take me?" (asked of bro again)

That's seven.  In about a one-minute time frame.  She may exceed the average.  I always knew she was above par.

The other day we were driving in the car and she was chatting away and asking questions about her birth (but nothing too stressful!).  I told her she was born via C-section and briefly how that worked.  She followed up with, "Did they use a sewing machine when they sewed you up, Mommy?"

And the last question I'll share with you today from this adorable white-haired over-achiever:  "Mommy?  Doesn't your mouth ever get tired of talking?  Mine does!"