A couple weeks ago, my daughter texted me at 3:08, telling me she was on her way from school. At almost 4:00, she was not home yet. Her school is 25 minutes away, but even with some extra wiggle room, I was definitely feeling concerned. I was weighing my options: I could text, but if she was driving, I knew she wouldn't text or pick up her phone if I called (good girl!); I could begin driving the route I knew she took toward school and hope we passed each other quickly; or I could pray fervently. I choose the last option, and bided my time for a bit. In just a few more minutes, she arrived home, knowing I would be worried and was full of apologies. She had stopped at the grocery for a muffin and Starbucks and forgot to text me to let me know.
The situation reminded me of a conversation I had had with a friend whose children are a few years older than mine. She used the Find My Friends app on their iPhones -- they all joined and could check each other's location when there was a concern. I brought this up to my daughter that evening, and she quickly agreed that it was a good idea to sync our locations. Good. Done.
The next day, when my teenage son arrived home from a friend's house, I mentioned the story to him and told him I wanted him to sync up as well. I was met with resistance. "Don't you trust me?", he said. I explained to him that I trusted him very much (which is true, and a gift I don't take for granted!), but it was for his safety. After a few more minutes of conversation, he understood my point and synced up too. (Although I had also explained to him that, whether he agreed with me or not didn't especially matter in this case.)
My husband and I don't consider ourselves helicopter parents -- we don't check their daily assignments online, I don't monitor their grades every day. We try to let them fight their own battles, and approach teachers on their own when there is a concern. We expect them to do their chores around the house without constant badgering, and we think kids can clean toilets! In general, we try not to coddle them or hover.
BUT - I felt the Find My Friends app was a different bird. This app will give me peace of mind when my kids are driving, and could help us find them if they have trouble (one friend used this app to find her daughter when she had had a car accident!). I don't plan to use it unless I am concerned about their travel time, and when they are away at college, I will turn it off (sniff, sniff!).
After I synced my family to my phone, a lovely thing happened: Each of the four of us has a little circle with our picture in it. And when all of us are home, the circles are all stacked up on one another, right on our street. I can't tell you what happiness all those circles stacked up together at our house brings me.
When all of us are home together, all is right with the world. ❤️
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